lonely and sadly alone...

Well, you know I have to be honest here, on Friday I felt terribly alone, sitting in the lounge devouring red wine, after buying frozen sweet potato fries and baking some fish, then watching some dodgy movie on teevee that was neither fantastic nor offensive to me. You know those movies.

It could well be that 'festival remorse' is real. I mean let's face it, several times a year (well, okay, a lot of the year) I spend my time with my festival families. Then I have to leave them. All of a sudden it's "goodbye, see you next year" - as we're all transient bastards, let's not lie about it.

Spending a few weeks in Sydney was both overwhelming and lovely at the same time. Met a wonderful new crew of peoples, but also felt particularly out of place in that city. Everyone seems too well dressed, or perhaps it was just that I saw a lot of corporate people and that generally makes me shudder. There's a difference between a nice suit and a dude standing on a corner with one of those blue tooth headsets (i thought no-one used them anymore, turns out I was wrong) looking like he's talking to himself, but it being about something terribly important like the next big thing, or budgeting or some crap.

I did, however, enjoy the fact that a bunch of people were coming together to watch footage and ideas from across the globe in many languages. It really has reignited my fascination for film (like it was ever  really gone? i guess other things took precedence in recent years) and think fondly of those friends within that industry thinking 'bravo'.

And GO TEAM BOX OFFICE.

This festival remorse will become all the worse I am sure when I return to Canada soon to help out on Shambhala and have to head back to the Land Of Oz so quickly. I had such an amazing time there last year, even if I did sound like Darth Vadar for a few days and get hooked up to some oxygen therapy. And I had camping neighbours that had yip-yip costumes.

So... Festival Number 36 will you please stand up...

That continual feeling that I belong in that country instead of my own will probably never pass. I've got this strange feeling I will always regret leaving when I did, and always regret not checking out what the requirements would have been for me to stay.  I didn't want to work a lot when I was there, I made that choice, I developed other skills and kept everything flexible to fit in with my disappearing act type lifestyle.

We are so lucky here, and I get jack of people that complain and scare monger, do things for their own gain. Like SUCK IT UP all of you, we have low unemployment, medical care for all, a Government that is actually moving towards decreasing our environmental impact... I mean of course not all of these things are perfect, we are still fighting for many important things to be heard / passed / understood. But to whine and moan about pricing and such, think less. It's always more.

Do you really NEED 3 televisions, 2 cars, shoe hire, hot dog, fries and a coke?! To run your air conditioner or heater 24 / 7, then cry about electric bills?! Put on a jumper!

Our shitty media largely to blame for our over-consumption of just about everything. You need the latest gadget man, seriously, you do... *scoff*.

Look outside it, and get involved in what is local to you.

{ Actually can I ad that some of the television advertising I have seen lately REALLY gives me the shits. Clubs Australia trying to convince us that they are part of a solution... banks using high profile celebs to make them sound like a charity... mining companies trying to prove that they work along side environmental projects. Y'all make me sick. }

here ends the ranting...

it's raining...

not men, but outside.

so curious things have been happening... annoyed online friends that i mention boys.... well i can't help that.

i have no idea what to write there are many things going through my head.

i am starting a months work tomorrow, temping. the only thing that worries me is the possible travelling time, because even tho it should realistically take me no more than 20 mins, the traffic here is so unpredictable it's hard to know. i guess i'll gauge it tomorrow.

we've churned through arrested development all three seasons recently at wilton street, now we're back onto starting at episode one of sex and the city. by the time its over i might have some cash to get house season 3.

the dvd collection is kind of getting out of control, it's not that it's a bad collection, but once you get stuck into a collection it's kind of hard to stop. it kind of makes me a big consumer doesn't it?

still desperately trying to go through and cull things. there's an op shop bag, an ebay box and a stuff to give to friends who have kids that are just awesome bag.

had a nice time slothing with a friend watching death proof for like the fourth time...

that's all for now.
xJ

the 2008 list of things to do...

last year i made a list with the help of erin and narelle... did 'okay' on it but not spectacularly.
so this year i made a shorter list...

1. House sit in RADelaide in winter - yes that's happening very soon
2. One movie a month - well i've already screwed that one
3. SWIM!
4. One book a month - screwed that one too but only by one month
5. get paid to work on at least one festival... yeh i'll work on that
6. visit bEC and Evo is tasmania - done
7. cook one new recipe per fortnight - ok i'm behind on this one too, that's what housesitting in RADElaide is for
8. Record some covers with Nigel
9. Quit stinking job before it kills me - done
10. Dont get your heart broken.

so i'll keep you posted on these...

xJ

INTO THE WILD

Jasper and I went to see INTO THE WILD last night.

It was beautiful. We left with red eyes and felt the need to sit and talk for a while.

Thank you Jon Krakauer for the orig narrative in novel form (i'm picking up my copy from the bookshop tomorrow and look forward to devouring it promptly).

Thank you Sean Penn for never letting go of your dream of making this film and creating something spectacular.

Emile Hirsch, you were great at Christopher... i mean Alexander. Supporting cast were also wondeful.

And most of all thank you thank you Christopher McCandless for documenting your journey that allowed all of us to join you... rest in peace.

Please, go and see it. It will change you....

xxJ