SPLENDARO

meander, keep moving, that's what it's all about isn't it?! not the hokey pokey, that just CAN'T be what it's all about...

Saturday, January 31, 2004

how to go to the Big Day Out for less than 90cents...

keep an open mind people....

so, find out what volunteer positions are available for these kinds of events! If you haven't volunteered for a music festival before, think twice before throwing yourself in the deep end.

Considering I've run my own mini festivals in the past ("Reverberation" at Inzone a few years back over Australia Day, as well as three d's 21st birthday) and been a part of MBA/Fuse the last two years... I know that it's not easy work. If you think you're going to not be tired and will have the ability to function the following day... think again!

My good friend Michelle had the opportunity to do a bit of paid work co-ordinating volunteers and the 'crowd care' area of the big day out... so she threw some information my way. I managed to get a morning shift so could enjoy some of the bands from about 5pm. I arrived at 9:20am, lined up to get my workers pass for nearly an hour, started crowd care when the gates opened about 10:30am. Our jobs basically to be the eyes and ears on the ground, give information, report any wierd stuff/dangers etc.

We were provided with lunch, and water and softdrinks when we needed them throughout the day... and were given a BDO t-shirt and CD as thanks, as well as entry to the rest of the event.

Yeh, so I walked around for about 4 1/2 hours I guess, spending two hours in the middle at the Crowd Care tent providing stuff like ear plugs, water and chupa chups.

I spent 90 cents on a hot cinnamon donut...!!

I saw Peaches, Aphex Twin/Luke Vibert (disappointing), Flaming Lips (fun and balloon filled), Basement Jaxx (loud and full of people), and of course some of Metallica, some of the Strokes... some of the Dandy Warhols, some of Muse, The Darkness (good) and some of most things really.

There was not too much trouble that I saw...

What kind of shits me though is how messy the place gets so quickly... I mean you think about during an event such as the Royal Show where there are large volumes of people at the showgrounds... probably about half the amount of a Big Day Out on a daily basis I guess throughout the Royal Show... but why the *FuCK* do people think it's okay to throw their drink containers, iceblock wrappers, and BDO paraphanalia everywhere? It kind of discusted me (and it did at the Falls as well) that people couldn't walk 5 steps and put something in the bin. There is nothing more fowl than trying to find a place to sit on some grass, and having to move food wrappers or empty cans or whatever to sit there, and then wondering if there is still some of the food and/or drink where you are about to sit anyway...

FridayFive.Org
You have just won one million dollars:
1. Who do you call first?

Nic! "so about that trip to amsterdam...??"

2. What is the first thing you buy for yourself?
a bottle of white sambuca...

3. What is the first thing you buy for someone else?
tickets to europe for my closest 15-20 mates...

4. Do you give any away? If yes, to whom?
The Otherway Centre where my friend Terri works...

5. Do you invest any? If so, how?
more than likely in rental properties...


REWIND...
Thursday I picked up the kids from Team Plastique from the airport, they were supporting Peaches that night... I showed them the Central Markets where we bought a shite-load of tea from the TBar.

Then we trouped into three d for their interview on Eco Noise, and back to Benjamin's. I left them to their devices whilst going to do paperwork and such for my temp jobs, and went to the BDO meeting as well.

When I returned to the city at 9pm to Enigma... I only managed to catch the last 3 songs of the TP set... which I was very angry about, but I really enjoyed it. They did strange things with fake money and hundreds and thousands... if they are in your city, costume it up and get on down and have a rawkus time!!

Bit by Bats were good as always... Benjamin called them the Adelaide Chapter of the Strokes... whilst I agree and disagree... I still think they're good. But I think the Strokes are average now that their most recent album sounds pretty much like the last one... I can't believe Buck65 (go back through his Love Letters section on the site) put it on his top 10 albums of last year... but yeh, that's opinion, so who am I to judge such a handsome man?

Peaches was INCREDIBLE! If you didn't see her, you missed out on...

{to be continued}

Wednesday, January 28, 2004

stuff i've been listening to today...

Indie Pop sounding gear:
the Lovemakers: Self titled - kind of reminds me of Shotz hels!

Electronica / Experimental:
Comatone: one into one out
Plaid: Spokes
Psychonauts: Songs for Creatures

Pledge to visit Iceland if the Government stops whaling

stuff and things,
xJ

miao miao miao miao

My life has been rated:
Click to find out your rating!
See what your rating is!


Aww, I wanted to be R Rated like Morgan. Bummer!

Buck65 is such a skinny white man! but we love him anyway...

hmm. more soon.
xJ

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

back to reality...

...the reality is, there's no point worrying about it at all... I mean, hell, it will sort itself out eventually...

i'm becoming less and less concerned about opening 'dialogues'. After all, we're all adults here, and if someone can't talk to you when you ask them a question, then give them a couple years and try again!

I neglected to mention that at Saturdays party I felt rather old. Don't ask me why, because there were a few *much* older people around than me... but I don't know. I'm gaining a whole bunch of friends that are in the 19-22 bracket... now that I'm 25 1/4 I am starting to feel old.

I think I just can't believe it's nearly February! Where did January go?

I'm still in love with Buck65...

Check out some Aussie gear like 'Ubin' and 'The Bird'... Ben Walsh is coming to the Fringe to do some music shows in the Garden of Unearthly Delights. He's the percussionist with the Bird. Definately check him out.

xJ

i am spiralling...

out of control...

seriously!

not even aimee mann is settling me down at the moment, and that's saying something.

if you love someone, set them free? what a fucking joke!
did someone really think it was *THAT* easy? if they did they need a new brain.

That's Just What You Are: Aimee Mann
In our endeavor we are never seeing eye to eye
No guts to sever so forever may we wave goodbye
And you're always telling me that it's my turn to move
When I wonder what could make the needle jump the groove

I won't fall for the oldest trick in the book
So don't sit there and think you're off of the hook
By saying there is no use changing 'cause

That's just what you are
That's just what you are

Acting steady always ready to defend your fears
What's the matter with the truth, did I offend your ears
By suggesting that a change might be a thing to try
Like it would kill you just to try and be a nicer guy

It's not like you would lose some critical piece
If somehow you moved point "A" to point "B"
Maintaining there is no point changing 'cause

That's just what you are
That's just what you are

Now I could talk to you 'til I'm blue in the face
But we still would arrive at the very same place
With you running around and me out of the race

So maybe you're right nobody can take
Something older than time and hope you could make
It better, that would be a mistake

So take it just so far
'Cause that's just what you are
That's just what you are
That's just what you are

Acting steady always ready to defend your fears
What's the matter with the truth, did I offend your ears
You're like a sleepwalking man, it's a danger to wake you
Even when it is apparent where your actions will take you

That's just what you are
And that's just what you are
That's just what you are
That's just what you are
ENDE


Just when I get ready to put my foot down, someone starts to care again!!
Just when I'm ready to work hard, settle myself down for a bit but flock off travelling at the end of the year...

I don't know what I want out of life anymore, not that I think I ever have...
I hold on to so many things, take things very personally... I'm sure it's a bad quality to have. I mean, I suppose it says that you care but shit, sometimes I wish I just forgot what was said, and stopped dreading what is yet to be said.


Ray: Aimee Mann
Ray, as of today
I can't say things will ever be the same
And that could be a shame

'Cause though I think I know
Another lonely exile when I see one
And you appear to be one
Still...

I'm playing it down 'cause I could really be found
If you've got it to spare
I'm playing it cool but it's terribly cruel
'Cause I ought to be there

And Ray, what can I say
You don't know me and it's just wishful thinking
To keep myself from sinking

And hence, no evidence
To support any theory I have handy
That you could understand me
And so...

I'm playing it down 'cause I could really be found
If you've got it to spare
I'm playing it cool but it's terribly cruel
'Cause I ought to be there

('Cause you're as bad off as me)

And Ray, can we repay
Ourselves for days that we've
lost through indecision
With one of recognition

If so, then here I go
'Cause some things you know
And some you just believe in
And hope it comes out even

I'm playing it down 'cause I could really be found
If you've got it to spare
I'm playing it cool but it's terribly cruel

'Cause I ought to be there
I ought to be there
I ought to be there
ENDE

I didn't sleep last night... for more reasons than the physical ones... I play and replay conversations over in my head, play ones that haven't even occured yet... and keep my head spinning so I can't sleep.

...except I forgot I had chamomile tea downstairs, should have drunk some.

I don't know how to explain any of this without going too much into my consciousness... my private life... and I know I know I know I've projected so much of it already on here, but I don't want to project some of these things. Because I honestly think I'm going slowly insane. And if I can't calm my head down soon I'm really going to do some damage to myself.

"maybe everything is all for nothing, still you'd better keep it to yourself
cos god knows it's not safe with anybody else" It's not safe: Aimee Mann

xJ

Sunday, January 25, 2004

absence makes the heart grow fonder...

FridayFive.org (on a sunday again)

At this moment, what is your favorite...
1. ...song?

Aimee Mann: Ray or Richard Easton: I was at the Party

2. ...food?
Samosas

3. ...tv show?
neighbours? i've been watching more docos recently than 'shows'

4. ...scent?
kitchen smells... fresh food... sweat

5. ...quote?
"don't be afraid of grief or sadness it can be fruitful..."
"television is the opium of the masses"


Lawnmower Music: 93.7fm Adelaide Metro Area: Sunday 2-4pm
Artist: Track: Album: Year: Country

The Renevators: Whistle Stop: Instrumental Extensions: 2003: Australia
Radio Active: Confidence: Bmmnm Vol 1 Breakbox: 2003: USA
Ubin Featuring Vassy: RedRoom: Evolutionary Vibes compilation: 2003: Australia
Richard Easton: I was at the party: Darkan: 2003: Australia (Perth)
Aimee Mann: Ray: I'm with Stupid: 1995: USA
Liam Gerner: This is all we can do: Brother: 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
Lou Reed: Satellite of Love: Transformer: 1972: UK
Bidston Moss: Yabbie Pie: A nice lie down...: 2001: Australia (Melbourne)
Lovage: Lifeboat: Music to make love to your old lady by: 2001: USA
Billie Holiday: My man: Jazz me blues compilation: (compilation put out 1996): USA
Team Plastique: Song Rabbit: Suck: 2003: Australia (Brisneyland)
Underworld: Kittens: Human Traffic soundtrack: 1999: UK
Clint Mansell (ex-Pop Will Eat Itself!!): 2piR: 1999: UK
Hello Minnesota!: Forget Boy: (Demo EP): 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
Lucy Beegle: I like lollies (but i don't like you): and another thing...: 1999: Australia
Indoor: Last night a DJ saved my life: More platinum disco compilation: 2003
LOVE SONG DEDICATION: The Captain + Tenille: Love will Keep us together: Love will keep us together: 1974: USA
The Manhattan Transfer: Sing you Sinners: Swing: 1997: USA
Paper Tiger: What would you do?: by the way...: 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
Lisa Miller: Hang my head (live): Hang my head EP: 1997: Australia
Music vs Physics: Retribution Realisation: _Underscore: 2003: Australia (Melbourne)
The New Pollutants: Blast the World into Space: Urban Professional Nightmares: 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
Mugison: I'm on Fire: Lonely Mountain: 2003: Iceland
The Muppets: Can you picture that?: The Muppet Movie: 1979
Patsy Cline: I fall to pieces: Greatest Hits
Elton John: The Bitch is Back: The very best of...
Everly Brothers: Bye Bye Love: That'll be the day soundtrack
Carole King: So far away: Tapestry
David Bowie: Fashion: Changes Two: 1981
Home for the Def Big Band: Safety Officer: Not Valid if Mutilated: 2001: Australia (Adelaide)
The Blow Monkeys: You Don't Own Me: Dirty Dancing soundtrack

bye byes.
xJ

lack of fundage...

...means lack of me setting the puter up at home and having internet...

so yes, i come to radio early today to blog, to read the 25 odd emails that have bulked up in my mailbox... including one that tells me I've won large amounts of money in a sweepstakes... and whilst it *would* be handy to have all that money, i think that I'll just leave it sitting there, ignore what could have been, and keep going for job interviews. Sounds a bit random and shoddy to me!

And speaking of which, yesterday (Saturday) I had another phone call about a job in the city. Which would be uber-perfect for a number of reasons... I could ride everyday, I could bus if it rains, I can still do my food shopping at the central markets... and other things I haven't thought about til right now like the fact that CITRUS BLU would be across the road! F*CK YEH! Well watch me spend all my money on chili coffee!

ooh, now I *really* want the job!! how fickle am i?!

Perhaps I should go in reverse here...
Friday after having more interviews and spending 3 or so hours doing mundane tasks at the Fringe Office that needed doing... I trundled home, got myself a Pizza (norty) and tried to decide what I was going to do... you know a 'do i keep up appearances' question... I spoke to Michelle and she happened to be going to the location I was thinking of going... so Morgan, Michelle, Benjamin and I put on our glad rags, and headed to the Prince Albert for some acoustic-y goodness. Which meant I also got to see Heidi + Warwick, Spoz, Stuckey, Heath, Mike, Alicia, yada yada yada...

Following this it was on to the Grace Emily to go on a boy hunt. How fun! We were hunting a particular boy, but we found him, so that was good.

Discussing reincarnation, having my head blown off by a friend for trying to make a point (christ!! don't ask!), talking about the new film Lost in Translation (which I haven't seen yet but am told that I will like), and then running off for a therapy session.

And to my therapist, you rock my unexciting, non-descript world darling.

Headed into the Exeter later on but all the bands were rapped up, so all I could do was say hi to Denni and Annie and head home.

Total alcohol consumption was something like 3 beers, a shot of white sambuca, and a shot of Absinth. Absinth be *nasty*.

Saturday during the day one of my little cousins had her christening, so went to that and back to her parents after for heaps of food. Tasty indeed, got to catch up with my other cousins and stuff... yeh always good.

Later last night went down to Benjamin's for his house-mates going away party (call it an excuse for a party, but it was a fare-thee-well)... I intended to stay for short amounts of time then go celebrate Luke's birthday with him in town, but I joined myself at the hip to some people I knew and ended up having a not bad time. Hung out with Fin and some of his people that I hadn't met before, Mark, Zoe, Liz... and after dropping some of them home and returning, saw Annie and Sara... Matty B was also there with his missus, Tys, blah blah blah. People I like anyway.

It was just one of those things yet again where I felt out of place, because though I know some of these people quite well, there were large amounts of people that obviously had no idea who I was (though some of them recognised me by my radio voice which is kind of cool) and I really *really* dispise girls who give you funny looks because they don't know you, or you're talking to some guy they want to or something. Get OVER IT!

I mean shit! I've got no false vision of how I look. I don't look bad, but I'm not a flawless beauty either, in no way, shape or form. Do people find people that they don't know threatening? And for what reason?

It just really once again prooves to me that I'm a fringe-dweller, and I really do know some awesome people, but bringing them all together is always a hard thing, even though I think once everyone got to know everyone, it would be one big happy family... sort of thing.

Hell I don't know what I'm saying anymore, I really am quite tired.

Radio set-list coming your way soon.
xJ

Thursday, January 22, 2004

"oola walla hicky...

come on ya wanna lay me... pass the punch munchacho?" (at least it's something wierd like that... that's how I've always quoted it, cos even if it's not correct, it's fucking funny!)

most quotable movie *ever* i think. Wayne's World... GO you big red fire engine!!

"If he were an icecream flavour, he'd be praline, and dick."

well I met some of my fellow bloggers last night which was very cool indeed...
you can read some of them here, here oh and here... but that LAST nutter I've known for years, so does that count?

oh wow, they're playing "if you leave" on
the radio... by Orchestral Manouvers in the Dark... awww....
"if you leave, dont leave now, please dont take your heart away..."
"i touch you once, i touch you twice, i wont let go at any price, i need you now like i needed you then, you always said, we'll still be friends..."
"if you leave, dont look back, i will run the other way..."

wicked.

"hey mr donut-head-man, who's trying to kill you? i dont know but they better not!"

erm, last night at Jive I saw Hello Minnesota, *10# and the Ramonettes rock out Holly Brats birthday...

it's official, I'm broke! However optimistic that my job interviews both went well and that I'll have some kind of temp work very soon...

yes, yes i will.
another interview tomorrow.
bring me work, bring it now. well perhaps not next thursday or friday because i have BDO things to do... bands to chauffer 'round, volunteering to do, things like that... much more fun than working.
xxJ

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

Fringey goodness....

things I'm going to see at the Fringe, if you want to see any of them too let me know soon. I'm going to be buying tickets as soon as there's any spare money lying around...

12 Angry Men: Scott Theatre: March 5-7, 9-11, 13-14
Daniel Kitson: Nova Cinema: 4-14 March
Lee Mack: Nova Cinema: 24 Feb-14 March
I Spied - True Confessions of an ex-ASIO spy: FringeHub: 22 Feb-13 March
GUD: Nova Cinema: 9-13 March
Tripod in LADY ROBOTS: Union Hall (Fringe Hub): 21-28 Feb, 2-6 March
Berlin Cabaret: Weimar Room: 20 Feb-14 March

Locals you should check out:
Craig Egan's Summer of ROCK tour: Rhino Room: 2-13 March
Good Times with Mark Trenwith + Jarrod Fitch: FAD: 29 Feb-6 March
Mixed Grill with Trav Nash + Average (the band): Belgian Beer Cafe: 20 Feb-13 March
Pete Monaghan in Stupid, but Lucky: Belgian Beer Cafe: 20 Feb-14 March
Scott (John)+ Big Al's Big Night: Beligian Beer Cafe: 25 Feb-13 March

In fact, I want to see the whole kit and kaboodle, but if people want to let me know ASAP if they want to go to anything... then we'll organise some group outings. Lovely.
xJ

am i the queen, or am I the QUEEN?

yesterday I spent the AM sending off resumes to nice temp agencies asking for work...

one rang me late yesterday and the other this morning...

so i have TWO interviews (count them *two*) with the possiblity of several jobs, mainly accounts receivable/debt collection ones, but if they are temp assignments I don't care. I need Fringe money damn it, and I need it now!

I also need money to eat and pay bills... yes that *would* help.

rock and rule,
xJ

Monday, January 19, 2004

feelin' hot hot hot...

...i am listening to Team Plastique from Brisneyland as Mr Speed decided they were 3D interview-worthy and asked me to sort it... so I'm sorting it.... and they are 3D worthy indeed. A little bit crunchy in parts, but nothing like a chocolate milkshake... and there is lots of nudity and tight clothing on their artwork so bring it on I say.

They will be here to play with Peaches on the 29th Jan and also the following day on the Lilypad stage at the BDO... so check them out, yar?

I hate looking for work again, I mean the interviews don't phase me, but the whole process of it shits me... sending in applications, waiting... blah blah.

Can someone just put a job in my lap please?
Come on, I work hard, I've got bulk-ace admin skills and I need work immediately.

Shortly I'll give a list of what stuff I want to see at the Fringe Fest...

xJ

Sunday, January 18, 2004

oh, also...

having a personal circus for your celebrating non-smoking picnic is VERY cool...
it's actually motivated me to pick up the juggling balls again... actually mine are square... anyhoo...

i've decided i have to get some full time work again if I'm to organise my trip up the East Coast later in the year... AND if I'm to have a good Fringe Festival too!!

I think the most interesting people I've ever met have always been ones I've passed for small amounts of time, and then maybe vaguely kept in touch with... for example...

Phil: was here last fringe and was just the most awesome, caring and sometimes paranoid person i'd ever met (ref: phil being concerned that all 25 people I'd brought to his final show had had a good evening... me going 'dont be silly' and him saying 'oh, now you're mad at me'... hehe) but you know we've kept in touch... lately it's been more and more sporadic but I guess that happens eventually... I haven't seen him for 2 years, but hopefully he's due back in my home town soon so I can have a good catch up and cook him dinner.

karen + muffin: these rockin rollin girls from brassy made my day as well... when i interviewed them we all got the giggles, at their show i jumped around like i had a day to live... then went to chat to them after the gig, probably had them look at me strangely whilst stretching and doing yoga poses in their dressing room, gave them cuddles and gathered signatures for other people that didn't have the nerve (go trav!) and sent them on their way... i hope they are well. they were such cool chicks, no matter WHAT ANYONE on JJJ has to say about them. you fucking assholes JJJ!

buck65: was here in December... I interviewed him on 3d and went along to his show which was a big inspiration... i had left my writing books at home so much in the 6 months prior, now I take them everywhere... he had some interesting things to say... thought Platypus' didn't exist... things like that... he made my day. he also liked one of my favourite words codswallop. i know that's trivial, but i thought it was funny.

alan: i met alan on the bus the other day.... we had like a speed-conversation... if that makes sense... we just talked a mile a minute and i learnt so much about him in the 20 or so minutes i talked to him... it was really wierd, but i also thought that it's such a cool thing being able to just converse with someone you don't know... even if at high-speed... he also made my day.

more soon...
"in the essence of life
there is such death
and the grains of sand on the beach
represent all that we are..."
Copyright to me ya buggers! (Julie Faye F)

xxJ

a hoi-hoi and a soi-soi of course...

Today is my 365th day of not smoking.... WOOHOO!
*MASSIVE BOW FROM ME*

Ok, so I've decided to add a little more info to my set lists.... in particular, album names, where the bands are from etc etc...

Lawnmower Music: Sundays 2-4pm: 93.7FM three d radio: Adelaide Metro Area
Artist: Track Title: Album: Year: Country

The Renevators: Whitstle Stop: Instrumental Extensions: 2003: Australia
Goyte: Out of My Mind: Boardface: 2004: Australia (Melbourne)
Buck65 *be still my beating heart*: Protest: Talkin' Honky Blues: 2003: Canada
Music vs Physics: Post Op Alley Drop: Underscore: 2003: Australia (Melbourne)
Phat Albert: What it is: Rudiments Lesson Won: 1999: Australia (Adelaide)
Superfluid: Lodoss: Evolutionary Vibes compilation, The Summer of our Discotheque: 2003: Australia
LOVE SONG DEDICATION: Bob Marley + the Wailers: Is this Love?: Legend: 1984 (Island Records)
Lionel Hampton: Hamp's Boogie Woogie: Swingsation (compilation 1998): recorded Oct 16 1944 in LA
Buena Vista Social Club: Macusa: (single): 1997: Cuba
The Specials: Ghost Town (extended version): Limited Edition 12" from the 3d vault...: 1981: UK
G Love + Special Sauce *swoon*: Kicken' Back: The Falls Festival Compilation: 2003: USA
Handsome Boy Modelling School: The Truth: So... How's Your Girl?: 1999: USA
Mugison: One Day She'll Park the Car: Lonely Mountain: 2003: Iceland
Electralane: Take the Bit Between your Teeth: The Power Out: 2004: UK
Anjali: 7x8: (EP): 2003: UK
Huggybear: Fuck Your Heart: Weaponary Listens to Love: 1994: UK
Barcode: Lust: Killing the Boy: 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
Snap! Crakk!: Neon Lights: (Independant Demo): 2003: Australia (Adelaide)
The Cat Empire: The Crowd: Homebke 7 compilation: 2003: Australia (Sydney)
Grover Washington Jnr: Moonstreams: Feels so Good: 1975: USA
Luke Vibert: Liptones: Yoseph: 2003: UK
Her Space Holiday: Key Stroke: Indietronica compilation: 2003
XTC: Science Friction: Waxworks Singles 1977-1982: UK
Baggsmen: Close to Me: DMA Compilation: 2003: Australia (Cure Cover)
Billie Holiday: Lady Sings the Blues: Carnegie Hall Live: November 1956: USA


FridayFive.Org
1. What does it say in the signature line of your emails?
"Television is the Opium of the Masses"

2. Did you have a senior quote in your high school yearbook? What was it? If you haven't graduated yet, what would you like your quote to be?
I dont know what it was... but it should have been "if life is crust, and bread is immortal... what happens when you burn the toast?"

3. If you had vanity plates on your car, what would they read? If you already have them, what do they say?
they WOULD say "Jet X"

4. Have you received any gifts with messages engraved upon them? What did the inscription say?
nah, no-one loves me that much...

5. What would you like your epitaph to be?
that is a really wierd question to ask... perhaps 'see ya when i'm lookin at ya'... but hell, i'll be dead... will i really care?

bye byes.
xJ

Thursday, January 15, 2004

whether or not...

i should publicly post this i don't really know, but sod it!

yesterday after all my slackness, worrying and other descriptive words, i hauled my ass to the doctors... 8:30 in the morning mind you, but at least it made me get out of bed...

several things are bothering me, one is the fact that I've been getting headaches on and off for about a week, however I think that is possibly my back being out of place or something... I'm patiently waiting for my masseuse to return to town to give me a good rub down.... mmmm massage...

secondly, i'm so lethargic all the time some days it's excrutiatingly hard to get out of bed... then when I do get out of bed, I feel like half my brains missing or something... in a total haze all day, and I don't like it.

thirdly, there has been a lump giving me grief in my chest... it was there a while ago and used to flare up at particular hormonal times of the month... however it's been *way* more noticable recently... so the Doc sent me off to get an UltraSound just to be sure, because she said it didn't feel right... luckily I actually could get in to the Radiologist (or whatever they are) yesterday as well, so killed two birds with one stone, and got the results immediately. Concensus is: no problem. Thank god.

With all the "sickness"... some days are better than others of course... yesterday I felt better after getting the news that all was well with the lump that I actually managed to do productive things like cleaning and food shopping.

I also had a blood test to see if I have a deficiancy in something, perhaps diabetes, or some in balance somewhere... first blood test ever! and it didn't hurt one bit!!

I am still looking for more and/or different work at the moment... I really am getting frustrated with my job, but also trying to keep really up to date with the projects I have, and trying to motivate my bosses communication skills as well.

I start as a volunteer with the Fringe Festival tomorrow. The launch of the Official Program is tomorrow, and stuff. WOOHOO!

Get yourself a program, and buy tickets to the OPENING show of PHIL NICHOL's... I'm gonna sell it out baby!! Actually I'll probably organise to buy tickets as a group or something... but yeh, let me know if you're interested.

Watched a Doco on Woody Allen last night on the ABC. not bad.

This is the end of the ramblin'....
xJ

Tuesday, January 13, 2004

*grumble*

my back is sore...
my neck is sore...
my head is sore...
my brain feels like absolute mush...
i would rather sleep than go to work... that's how I feel...

so I have finally made that doctors appointment I promised to make such a long time ago... now I am scared out of my mind as to what they might find. It's not normal for me to feel like this, definately not.

I'm jeapordising everything by feeling like this though... work, volunteer stuff, my apparent motivation to get buff... and to be more creative, to be able to write more often... for which I have been spilling on to paper all over the house pretty well... I haven't cleaned properly in the longest time. There's paper everywhere, perhaps it's a sign... what sort of sign, I do not know...

at least I got paid today...

my heart left in a purple room somewhere...

So I watched Pi as well as Jay + Silent Bob Strike Back over the weekend... and the newest film by one of my fave directors PT Anderson 'Punch-Drunk Love'...
I can't explain them all now due to lack of brain power, but my god... watch Punch Drunk Love, its amazing...

Thursday, January 08, 2004

holy snorkel batman...

i really DO know that I find my work nullifying...

nul·li·fy ( P ) Pronunciation Key (nl-f)tr.v. nul·li·fied, nul·li·fy·ing, nul·li·fies
To make null; invalidate.
To counteract the force or effectiveness of.

all in all, i like being in charge of an office, but when you get little to no direction from your superiors it makes it very hard.

hmph.

xJ

Wednesday, January 07, 2004

okay, okay, let's get serious...

hmm... things I have noticed, somewhere, somehow in my last 48 hours of possibly having a migrane headache... which is terribly odd because I don't get migranes...

1) the show "Teachers" on ABC is uber-cool...

2) the Steve Irwin thing, whilst kind of odd, and perhaps un-called for and irresponsible or whatever... was something that was AGAIN blown out of preportion on commercial teevee... refer the footage he gave to A Current Affair... now I hate current affairs shows because ultimately they destroy lives... but i wanted to watch this in my vague headach-ey state... and he did take precautions... anyway. whatever. it's steve irwin. he is a nutter. but he's passionate and an entertainer too. so, hmm, stuff and things. I'd be curious to see what the people that were in the Australia Zoo audience thought of it. They were there after all!

3) i'm almost starting to think, though I love Adelaide and am an ambassador of how cool it is... that I might want to get out for a bit...

got sent a new CD by 'Gotye' called Boardface... it's not bad at all. Due for release in February, but I'll give it a burl on my show, let me know what you think... I like it.

i think more of you should answer the VOX POP... sharon and adam are going to be mad with you if you don't!! you'll have to scroll back about a week...

xJ

Tuesday, January 06, 2004

sex, drugs and rock and roll...

ok, ok, so about being an emotional wreck... i think it's because I watch too much daytime teevee now. I can't get by without a good dose of Dawsons Creek (where Jen's Grandma has just found out she has breast cancer)...
as well as the occasional episode of Oprah, or tele movies like Gideon...

maybe it's the impending return of an old friend...

maybe it's wondering if another friend really is okay... and not having the opportunity to talk to them outside a work environment is kind of killing me... softly... with his song...

love is a many splintered thing...

recently, i've seen/heard a few things about people wanting to get married... Pippa and I agree that either (or perhaps both) of us would marry Robbie Williams. Because he's hot. And he's less of a prude than I thought...

stuff and things...
xJ

Sunday, January 04, 2004

i stayed home?

what's wrong with me?
apart from the fact I just realised in the last 24 hours that I probably am an emotional wreck for varying reasons...
I had invitations to go places, however not having the car as well as not being arsed, not wanting to spend too much money... even though I went and spent up charge-plenty in the city as well... norty... well I needed new pillows and a throw rug didn't I? and a new kettle... I'm sick of burning myself!!

LAWNMOWER MUSIC: 93.7FM: Sundays at 2pm
The Renovators: Whistle Stop (instrumental)
Hello Minnesota: The Litany (of things that weren't much fun)
G Love + Special Sauce: Kickin' Back
Tricky: Singin the blues
Music Vs Physics: Post Op Alley Drop
Basement Jaxx: Hot + Cold
Huggy Bear: Her Jazz
Soundgarden: Big Dumb Sex
Matt Small: My Love is Gone (LOVE SONG DEDICATION)
Midnight Oil: The Dead Heart
Tripod: Science Facts are Useful
The Specials: Hey little rich girl
Handsome Boy Modelling School: The Projects
Breakdown: First of All (Crazy Penis Remix)
The High Llamas: High on the Chalk
Electrelane: Teach the Sailor to Pray
Luke Vibert: Freak Time Baby
Kid 606: PowerBookFiend (i say: "mmm crunchy")
The Creatures: Attack of the Supervixens
The Mess Hall: Lock + Load
(yeh, look, this is up til 3:20 or so, now I'm bored with it)

FridayFive.Org
What one thing are you most looking forward to . . .

1. ...today?

potato + leek soup when I get home...

2. ...over the next week?
getting paid!

3. ...this year?
Adelaide Fringe Festival

4. ...over the next five years?
travelling...

5. ...for the rest of your life?
growing as a person, and finding someone to love...
>>

ahh love... so foreign...
xJ

Friday, January 02, 2004

"shovel that coal let's roll..."

Baby Got Going: Liz Phair. What a cranking song...

we are playing some love song dedications again because we can't get enough... there are some RUDE ones coming out... none of this class that Mr Speed brought to the show by bringing 60's love-songs in... no...

DJ Tongue the Anchovy picked "Come in my mouth" by Earl Wilson. All class man, all class!

New Years Eve... well y'know New Years Eve is New Years Eve isn't it. I had a pretty fun night, but I wouldn't say it's the best night of the year for me... I don't know if I could actually label the best night of the year to you though...
Halloween was a laugh-riot... wearing wigs and costumes out is always a treat...

Anyhoo, went to Ernie and Eva's around 6pm and helped with cooking and taste testing the punch... drinking my sparkling red with Eva... well frankly I couldn't have been in the same room with her and NOT drunk any, bit of tradition now really...
on to the train at 10:50ish into the city to meet Pippa and her friend to go up to Rhino. Made it there with 10 minutes before 'countdown'...
kids smoking on the train, kids f*cking on the train, kids vomiting on the train... what WERE they thinking.... little shits.

the Rhino "Mansion" included the regular room upstairs, as well as the second bar downstairs with DJ's playing...
plus a third room that Charlie and Mick had organised for their mates... Nic-o bartended in the third room and poured me a nasty shot of I think Tequila and Kahlua... danger, will robinson, danger...
did a few laps of rundle... picked up chocolate, visited Tr!p and Speed, and returned to Rhino Mirth... afterwards was lucky enough to hitch a ride down to Craig + Frehd's for recovery and another countdown... hehe. got home at 6:45am... not bad for someone who doesn't take chemicals.

drank way too much alcohol, but it must have been spaced out enough for me to not be too drunk...

"breathe you deep as you seep into my life..."

"all the pain has gone away
and all the words i'd love to say
fall so easily to the page
and slip on the glaze...

all the rules are thrown away
and all the games we love to play
kissed the lips of which we're made
in my masquerade..."

love sucks.
loving someone who doesn't know you love them sucks.
loving someone who lives far away sucks.
loving someone who lives so close sucks.
xJ